van stats!

As I was driving to do rides for TreeHouse this week, I looked out at the hood of our mini van and smoke was billowing out! I pulled over and had to have another TH van pick me up! So for the first time in a long time I got to ride in the back of a van and have conversations with the youth in my van. There were only 10 kids in the van and as I was looking around I was seeing the diversity, beauty and brokenness of each of them.

7 of them come from one parent families or families of divorce.

3 of them have parents in jail.

2 of them have been raped or molested.

8 of them struggle in school and feel un-heard.

5 different races were represented.

2 of them have father's who are actively involved in the gang system.

1 has been in jail.

5 have been physically abused by their parents.

1 is not from America.

2 have been pregnant.

All of them want to be loved!

Thank you for helping me love on these incredible and beautiful youth!

"I have no more tears to cry."

I just started mentoring a new girl at TreeHouse. She is a senior in high school and one of the most open and honest people I have ever met. She has had some life experiences that have made her very cold and hard towards the world. She has no patience for people and doesn't want fake relationships.

On my second time meeting her she retold me of the extensive abuse she endured as a child. Things that would have haunted me forever, but she simply said, "I have no more tears to cry." As she was telling me about this I just kept on praying. God, be with her, heal her heart, show her she is worth more, help me listen, help me love.

It's hard for me to image what must have happened to her for her to say she has no more tears to cry. It is amazing to me that she continues to reach out to God and want a relationship with him. She is turned off from most people, relationships, sex and love, but she still loves God. That is amazing to me.

She answers any question I have for her and always welcomes advise. She is on track to graduate high school this year which means I will only get to mentor her through the end of this summer. I really hope that our relationship will continue to grow and that she will be impacted by the ministry at TreeHouse.

Teen Pregnancy

8 girls at our TreeHouse are either pregnant, or have a baby under a year and a half. Is it something in the water?

I am so frustrated with how unfair this is, and how unsafe these "kids" are being! I feel like I could talk to these girls day in and day out about sex. How not having it is the PERFECT birth control. And if they can't go on that path, that they NEED to be using birth control.

But some of these girls got pregnant on purpose. They see a baby as someone who will love them unconditionally.. but what they don't realize is that as the parent, you are in charge of loving them unconditionally.

As I step back and look at these girls and their family situations, many of these girls do not have fathers who are actively involved in their lives. And many of their mothers spend more time yelling at them and telling them what a waste of space they are, than loving them. Their parents are not loving them unconditionally. For some of them, their parents are not loving them at all. Having a baby often looks like having someone to love you. But being a parent means giving a lot more than receiving. I can think of countless times of me not giving my parents the recognition or love that they deserved, and them still loving me in return. These girls don't have parents like mine, so it is no wonder they see a baby as a way to fix their lives.

At this point what can I do? Giving up your baby for adoption is seen as a weakness with in these teenagers culture. The one girl who did give up her baby for adoption gets a bad wrap for it all the time.

I look up to her for her strength.

So my only option is to try and support these girls and reinforce that they are lovable, capable and worthwhile. That they are not alone, and that I will love them no matter what. Maybe my unconditional love for these girls will one day make and impact in their lives.

As always, please join me in prayer for these girls, for their children, and for their families.

peace to you. thanks for reading.

heather

Disappear

It was almost 12:00 am on Saturday night and my phone rings. I usually have my phone turned off by this time, but I accidentally left it on. When I answered the phone I could hear the slight sniffles of one of my girls. The first thing she says is, "I have never wanted to disappear more than I do right now."

As I listened to her story I couldn't help but get emotional. She has had such a hard life. With an alcoholic mom and a pot head dad she hasn't had much of a chance. Her parents split up when she was very little and her mother was still using drugs. She and her siblings have been shuffled around from house to house, eventually ending up with their father. All of the kids have anger problems, so things can get pretty heated at their house. Often they will end up saying something to their dad, and he then responds with a phrase such as, "I wish you were never born."

Earlier this fall her older sister gave birth to a baby, and the baby was so sick that she ended up passing away. And now she finds out her father is having another baby. With his girlfriend, whom all the children dislike.

She said, "I'm f***ing mad at God. Why would he do this to me? Why would he take away my sisters baby, and give one to my dad and his girlfriend who are high as a f***ing kite?"

I wish I had a good answer for her, but I don't. Some things in this world are so hard for me to believe. I do not believe that God "caused" this to happen to this sweet girl. I do believe however that He is with her in the midst of this. Though it is ever so hard to see, I know God is there. This girl told me later the next day that she was going to be praying for her dad because he is so messed up. She also said the only thing she can find comfort in during times like these is Psalm 88. If you get a chance to read it, it is a very dark psalm. David is crying out to God and feels like God isn't there. She finds comfort that even people in the bible feel scared and alone sometimes.

I am so impressed with her that even in her darkest moments, when she wants to literally hurt her father, she can still find it in her to pray for him. She has struggled with anger her whole life, so we try to really encourage her when she chooses to break that cycle.

Keep this girl in your thoughts and prayers this week. She needs all the strength she can get!

Girls ALL NIGHTER!

This past week Tami and I took 10 jr. high and high school girls on an all nighter! We left after treehouse got over on Thursday night and headed straight up to Brooklyn Park to the Brunzwick Zone. There we got to bowl for an hour and then play some LAZER TAG.

I came in 2nd in lazer tag, I might add!

After that we headed over to Applebees for some half priced apps and soda. Of course the kids didn't have school on Friday, so they felt sooooo cool going to a restaurant at midnight! Once we had had our fill of chips, salsa, chicken wings and coke, we headed back to my house for the night. The girls, much to my surprise just wanted to go to bed! So we ended up watching a movie and most of them just fell right asleep. Probably because many of them were in junior high and still have bed times!

The next morning Tami and I got up and made some chocolate chip pancakes and we had a family meal together! It was so great to see these girls who absolutely do not associate at school, come together and have a great time. We didn't have a specific purpose for this retreat, other than bringing a group of girls together who don't necessarily associate outside of school. I don't know if that has helped build any bridges between girls, but I do know that they had a great time!

The New Year!

Hello everyone! Treehouse is into the new year and things have been hard so far. I knew that we were in a bit of trouble because of the economy not being up to par, and being that we all had to take a furlough this fall I was assuming that this year would bring about yet another furlough. However last week we found out that two of our beloved staff at TreeHouse were going to be let go as well as all of us taking a 10-15% pay decrease for this upcoming year.

Plymouth TreeHouse happened to be one of the only fully staffed (4 people) areas so we lost one of our male staff members, as well as brooklyn park. It has been so hard to see him go. We had his goodbye party this past Thursday and it was amazing to see all of the lives that Tim impacted. Many of the youth in the room were crying and recounting all of the times he had helped them through their situations. I heard from several different girls who had been either abused or raped in their lives say that he was the first male that they had ever really opened up to. Since many of these kids don't have fathers in their lives it is very hard for them to want to have a relationship with our male staff. However, Tim Eaton surpassed those boundaries and found a way into their lives. And now their lives will never be the same. As shown Thursday night. One girl even said, "You are one of the reasons I believe that true love between a husband and wife is possible."

These statements both make me incredibly happy and break my heart. I'm so glad that we had Tim for as long as we did to help impact the lives of these youth. I will miss him so much in this upcoming year and I hope you will join me in prayer for TreeHouse. I pray that we will not lose any more staff and that we will get back on track financially. I realize that God is way bigger than all of these setbacks we are currently having, but it is hard to remember that on a daily basis.

Also keep Tim Eaton in your prayers and he journey's on to a new adventure in life!

thanks all!

Christmas Blessings!

Hey all! Sorry I have not updated you lately. I just wanted to let you in on a great christmas story! As I was at treehouse last week one of our alumni students was visiting and she came into our main room and saw our b-e-a-utiful Christmas tree. She got kind of a sad look on her face and said, "I wish our family could afford a beautiful tree."

The next day we got a call from one of my kids' mother. She said she and her family were really struggling this year and she was wondering if there was any way we could help. When one of our supporters got wind of this he very generously offered to purchase the trees and christmas gifts for the families! THEN, Target contacted TreeHouse and said they had TWO Christmas trees that they wanted to donate to these families. So today I got to go around to target and cub foods to pick up trees, gift cards, and gifts. Then I got to play santa claus to these families.

As I went up to "Megan's" house I knew she wouldn't be home but that her mother would be. I knocked on the door and was greeted with a smile and as I asked if she needed a tree she looked almost overwhelmed. When we brought it in I noticed that she had some house plants decorated with lights and she said that this was the most beautiful tree she had ever seen, and definitely the most beautiful tree she had ever owned.

Heading to the next house we got to drop off gift cards and two hams to another well known treehouse family. They were overjoyed because now they could afford to buy gifts for their family and feed them on Christmas morning. Then we got to drop off another huge tree and gifts for another family. When I took "Kelly" out later that night she said she was so surprised by the tree in her house! She said her little brother "kenny" ran up to the tree with a huge smile on his face and said, "now that's a big tree."

I was just overwhelmed with the generosity of our supporters who made that possible as well as target. I'm also overwhelmed with seeing the joy in the families that we got to give things to. I think that will be better than any gift I could ever ask for.

Please keep these families in your prayers as we continue to journey through life with them!